Journal #2: Their Eyes Were Watching God

Rules for a Caribbean accent:

1:  All "th" sounds are replaced with a hard "t" sound. (ex: with vs. wit)
2:  All a, eye, o or uh sounds are replaced with "ah." (ex: come on man vs. cahmon mahn)
3:  All sentences must end with the word man.  (ex: What's up? vs. Waht ees up mahn)
4:  All "i" sounds sound like "ee." (ex; It is hot! vs. Eet ees haht!)
5:  All "th" sounds are replaces with "d." (ex: That is crazy man! vs. Dat ees crazy mahn!)
6:  "My" becomes "me." (ex: That is my brother. vs.  Dat ees mi brahdah)
7:  All "er"and "al" endings to words become "ah."  See example above.
8:  "Tr" sounds are turned into "ch."  (ex: tree vs. chee)
9:  "Fr" sounds become "fw."  (ex: from vs. fwom)
10: "H" is removed from the start of words.  (ex: have vs. ave)
11:  "V" sounds are replaced with "b."  (ex: very vs. bery)

Pg. 2

Seeing their former teammate return to the beach they had played on together years ago brought back the jealousy they had all held when he left them in pursuit of a professional soccer career.  There was no hesitation to start degrading his present condition.

"Where ees hees sahca jahsee (soccer jersey) fwom dat pwofessionah sahca teem he be playing ahn mahn!-Why deed he cahm back too see ahs (us), he mahst naht ave been bery sahccessful now mahn!-Now he ess crahwling back to us now mahn!-  Why ess he naht driving no fahncy sports cah (car) now mahn!- Why ees hees hair not een crazee braids lahk ours mahn!- Ah wonder eef somwahn (someone) stole hees expenseeve sahca cleets mahn!- Ah bet dat sahca teem left heem een da dahst (dust) mahn!"

When he approached within earshot of them on the beach, they put on their best smiles and gave a warm Jamaican welcome of "ay mahn!" which was politely returned by him. "Ay mahn!"  They waited for more but he kept on walking down to the beach.

They noticed his strong, muscle knotted calves from years of playing soccer on the beach with them, and could sense his quickness through the way he walked.  They remembered the times he had made them look silly by dancing around them with the soccer ball in front of the girls, and now wondered if he was vulnerable enough to exact revenge on in the form of a rematch.